How Teaching Emotional Intelligence Helps Your Kids Thrive
And What Your Kids Actually Need to Thrive!
As a mother, you work tirelessly for hours, and you rarely hear the words ‘Thank You’ from the tiny humans you serve so selflessly. From packing lunches and tolerating tantrums to answering hundreds of questions every day, you are always there for your kids. You even help your kids in overcoming fear and anxiety so their confidence doesn’t suffer—all while teaching emotional intelligence in the little, unseen moments that shape who they become.
Yet, for some strange reason, you still wonder if you are doing enough. You always end the day lost in introspective thoughts and buried under a plethora of questions. Well, what if I told you that the problem is not you? What if it is the toxic notion of what a “good mom” is supposed to be?
The “Good Mom” Trap
Have you fallen into the “Good Mom” trap? Well, the “Good Mom” is a mythical creature because she never makes a mistake. She never yells, never scolds her child, and she never ever gets tired. She exists in dichotomies. Yet, somehow, she still fulfills all the expectations society has placed on her. She is calm, yet firm. Moreover, she is ever present, yet productive.
She handles every task from packing organic snacks and volunteering at the school to making sensory bins and reading out illustration books to her kids. She’s not a mom. She is a myth, and because we all believe in this notion so blindly, we are constantly on the cusp of breaking down and suffering from burnout. We are holding her up on a pedestal while we quietly fall apart. Now, that is pretty sad, isn’t it?
Why This Version of Motherhood Hurts
In the contemporary world, motherhood is not just a responsibility and an honour. Quite contrarily, it has become a performance, and you have become an unpaid actress in a show that never ends. What lies behind the scenes, you wonder? There’s nothing but feelings of exhaustion, guilt, shame, and failure.
If you have lately been feeling this way, here is the cold and hard truth: You are stuck beneath the pressure to be a perfect mother, and making your life utterly miserable. You might think it is good for your kids, but sadly, it isn’t helping them either! Your kids don’t need a perfect mom.
What Your Kids Actually Need: Teaching Emotional Intelligence Over Perfection
So, what do your kids actually need, if not a perfect mother? Well, they need you, with all your imperfections, flaws, and adorable quirks. They need a mother who gives them undivided attention and spends time with them. They need a mother who spends precious moments with them while teaching emotional intelligence and all that it entails.
Furthermore, they need to be taught good stories and fables so they learn life’s most important lessons in a fun and engaging way. They need nutritious food (not artificially-flavoured snacks), and they need to be validated even on their worst days. That’s all there is to it! No magic potions or special acrobatic skills are needed!
Now, let us move on to what your kids DON’T need. Well, for starters, they don’t need ballet, robotics, and piano classes all at once. Furthermore, they will be just fine without a mom who never loses her cool. They don’t need a spotless house or gluten-free homemade muffins every morning.
If you’re giving them the former, you are already doing a good job being the mother your kids actually need.
You Don’t Need to Earn Your Worth Through Exhaustion
You have permission to rest, to breathe, to simply be—there’s no need to fill every moment with tasks or attend every birthday party. It is okay to say no to more activities and yes to quiet, to stillness, to peace. Your need for space is not selfish. Remember that a whole and rested “you” is a gift to your children and not a sign of selfishness.
And when you are rested, you show up more intentionally—not only physically, but emotionally too, which is essential when teaching emotional intelligence to your kids.
Before You Run Away…
Before you search for ballet classes or robotics camps, pause. If you gave your child a warm hug, a calm “I see you,” a good book, a decent meal, and a moment of teaching emotional intelligence, then you have done more than enough. You are not failing. You are showing up. And that is exactly what a good mom looks like.
On A Final Note
Having one of those hard days? Check out the Empathy Heroes Class. It is not just for kids to or teach about kindness, courage, and empathy. It is a sanity-saving toolkit for moms, too. Real talk: You do not have to do it all or hold it all together. Support is here, and it actually helps. Because even superheroes need a break sometimes.
There you have it – The perfect mom manual and a guide to break free from the toxic notion of what a “Good Mom” ought to be. I hope it helps you in your journey of motherhood and allows you to be kinder to yourself—and stay committed to teaching emotional intelligence, both to your children and to your own inner voice.
